'Even hearing the words you are pregnant is something we've been waiting to hear for six years.'
Episode four finally gave us the yes we've been waiting for. Desi Perkins announced her long awaited pregnancy on YouTube in the fourth episode of 'Our Fertility Journey.'
Influencer and Youtuber Desi Perkins and her husband Steven have recently shared a new series on their joint YouTube Channel, The Perkins. The series is a montage of raw footage collected over months, if not a couple years of struggling with infertility. The final minutes of episode four finally revealing a beautiful baby bump. This isn't the first time the couple have opened up and let the online world in on their struggles to conceive.
Desi first shared the heart wrenching details of her a miscarriage two years ago in a YouTube video titled 'The Hardest Video I Ever Filmed.'
The miscarriage itself happen 6 years ago and that's exactly how long this battle with infertility has lasted for Desi and Steven. Prepare yourself - every no will break your heart. Get ready to press pause at least once per episode and think: I can't watch another no.
In the latest episode Desi reveals that years before she ever wanted to be a Youtuber she had dreamed of having a family of her own.
I remember when that first video dropped two years ago. Let's be honest, it's not everyday a woman struggling with infertility invites you into the depths of what they're experiencing and feeling. It was a shock.
For a twenty-year-old woman with no partner and no plans to have any children yet, I can only imagine what it feels like to lose a child you wanted so badly. I know I'm not the only one on this, but as a young woman it occasionally crosses my mind: what if I will never be a mother? What if I can never hold my own child and give my husband something he's always dreamed of?
www.fertilityexpert.co.uk report that: 'Across the world 1 in 7 women will experience problems conceiving and, surprisingly, this figure is the same in the UK as elsewhere in the world, even in developing countries.'
They also found that: 'In the UK over 85% of healthy women will get pregnant within a year of trying for a baby and this number increases to 92% within two years.' But for some women it's not that simple.
One in seven women worldwide experience trouble conceiving, yet very few women are as brave as Desi to open up about the struggles they face. This series not only raises awareness of what the millions of women worldwide struggling with infertility are going through but also the process of using IVF to conceive.
Women struggling with infertility should not have to go through it alone in silence and hopefully this series brings to light how painful it can be for some women to be asked: 'Are you planning on having kids soon?' Or 'Are you pregnant?' On a regular basis.
For as long as we can remember women have be measured on their ability to conceive and raise children. That's why the minute your teenage years are over people begin to ask - so, do you want children? How many? For those struggling with infertility it isn't easy small talk or light-hearted conversation.
Now imagine getting this question daily from 3.31 million YouTube subscribers and 4 million Instagram followers all over the world.
I'll never forget the moment that for the first time deep down in my stomach I yearned for another woman, who I have never met before, to get pregnant. In this series you see feel every no. You experience the rollercoaster ride of a possible pregnancy ruled out by the first drops of period blood. Prepare to cry. You witness and first-hand experience excitement contaminated by a looming fear of disappointment. Not this month, again.
In episode four Desi says:
'This journey has been so long, it's been six years and with every single needle, every single breakdown, every single medication, it's honestly brought us so much closer. If I didn't think I loved him enough before, I love him so much more now.'
For the first time in a long time, I sit at the edge of my seating waiting for the next YouTube video.
Happy Mothers Day, Desi.
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