I thought it all was over. And then in the middle of the night I lay paralysed watching a faceless figure climb through my bedroom window and approach my bed. Although it was a dream, I remember it like it happened yesterday.
If you’ve ever thought you sound stupid I would like to share with you the moment, roughly a year ago today, I sat in my doctors office and asked him if you know…there’s anything they can do about nightmares? That’s right, I sought professional help over nightmares. I would like to add this wasn’t my only reason for booking an appointment, so I guess that makes it a little more acceptable.
In a sweet tone with a hint of detectable pity he reminded me that no, there’s nothing he can offer me to stop my sleep paralysis. No pills, no therapy.
So, I guess I’m stuck with this thing.
But could I change the way you feel about this story if I told you I had nightmares so bad they triggered anxiety attacks? I’ve had sleep paralysis and other variations of nightmares and dreams since around 14. I used to have the same reoccurring sleep paralysis for around 4 years. It was a distinctive pattern. I would open my eyes and see my bedroom, unable to move. Then it would happen - I’m being strangled by a faceless figure. On other occasions innocent dreams would morph into this same paralysis.
There was even this one occasion where in true Hollywood horror movie style I was yanked off my bed.
Photographer Nicolas Bruno takes these stunning yet eerie self portraits to channel his experience with sleep paralysis into art:
If you’re feeling brave, watch this sleep paralysis stimulation. Now imagine you can’t move, breathe or turn it off.
I rarely experience ‘good’ dreams, the type you desperately try to fall back asleep for. It’s hard to describe but I see sleeping as anything other than beauty sleep. When I wake up in the morning unable to recollect anything significant from the previous night, I can breathe a deep sigh of relief.
For a long time I wanted to know someone else experienced the same thing but everyone I confided in just seemed confused as to what I was even talking about. So, I reached out to find some accounts people who experienced this same phenomenon:
(Individual’s accounts and descriptions will remain anonymous.)
One person says: 'For a second I think I've fallen asleep then suddenly I go into panic mode shouting for help but no words come out of my mouth, it's just in my head making it scarier. The best way to describe it would be to say I almost feel possessed during sleep paralysis because I hallucinate seeing a figure in my room.'
Another adds: 'So, I've only had it once but it was the most uncomfortable experience ever. So I was asleep laying on my back and my mind just came around and I was conscious but still asleep you know those times and I felt this aching pain in my arm like I could feel all the blood leaving my arm, so I opened my eyes and my arm was upright in the air tingling from not getting any movement. I tried to pull it down but I just couldn't move...I started shouting for my parents but no sound was coming out of my mouth and I just started crying...my biggest fear is death so I was petrified I was leaving my body in some bizarre way.'
A third account describes: 'The last time I had a full attack was when I was 21, like 2 years ago. I get mine a lot when I have high anxiety or stress, so now that I’ve found ways to cope with that they happen very rarely. My experience with them is you're awake but you can’t move... I sometimes will be able to open my eyes, sometimes not, or it feels like my eyes are open but they’re actually still shut. It’s the worst feeling in the world because no matter how hard you try your body is like a brick and just not moving. I have to go back to sleep to then be able to wake up again and move. I also sometimes see things in my paralysis like shadow-like figures or dots in the room which is also scary because you can’t tell if it’s real, whether you’re awake and can’t move, or you’re in sleep paralysis. The lines become very blurred.'
But what can science tell us about sleep paralysis?
Commerce gazette market research reports says that: ‘This happens when the body does not move smoothly through the stages of sleep. Sleep paralysis is a common condition in young adults and is generally associated with other sleep disorders such as narcolepsy. Sleep paralysis is of two types, if the sleep paralysis occurs while falling asleep then it is called hypnagogic or predormital sleep paralysis, where as if it occurs while waking up it is known as hypnopompic or postdormital sleep paralysis.’
Interestingly, doctors are increasingly using antidepressants to treat sleep paralysis. Commerce gazette also says: ‘Based on the drug type, the global sleep paralysis treatment market is segmented into: Stimulants Selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs) Tricyclic antidepressants Sodium oxybate.’
Would you consider taking antidepressant to supress sleep paralysis?
Looking forward, are we on the brink on a new wave of pharmaceuticals being introduced for those looking to stop these episodes?
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